This is a sensitive subject for many sufferers of depression and stress related mental illness, it has a lot of stigma and a bad reputation, and in most cases people around you won’t understand why you do it. They may accuse you of being an attention seeker, or an emo, or they might say cruel things to provoke a reaction in response to scarring or fresh wounds.
For me, self harm wasn’t about attention or image, it was an emotional release, at times when the stress or the depression hit an absolute pique and there didn’t seem to be any other way to escape the pressure hurting myself seemed a better option than hurting someone around me.
My battle with self harm included cutting and scratching, I would say those are probably two of the most well known varieties but there are others out there. I varied in severity, but I can honestly say I never tried to take my own life, I was able to stay away from those thoughts.
Firstly, I want to make it clear, I am in no way saying self harm is a good thing, I am not promoting it or suggesting you should try it as a stress reliever, I would never suggest that. But if you do self harm already or are intending to do so the most important thing I can say is: talk to someone. And if they doesn’t work and you do self harm, try to make sure you use something sterile to prevent infection, that is the last thing you want. Again I am not promoting the idea of self harm, but there is no reason to hurt yourself more than you intend to.
Also, if someone does start bullying you because of scars or fresh wounds, you tell them to go the hell away. They likely won’t understand what you are going through and they will be an increasingly negative influence upon you and your stress levels.
Self harm as been shown to temporarily release stress and pressure in sufferers, though it is not a long term solution, and its not an ideal one either. As I’ve said your best bet would be to seek some advice and talk to someone you trust if you start having thoughts of hurting yourself. If you are in school then see your school nurse, or talk to a teacher you get on well with, maybe even a close friend; you can always turn to your family, or your family doctor, or a family friend. There is always help available to you, you just have to reach out and grab it with both hands.
Now, if you are ready to take steps towards stopping self harm, there are some simple things you can do, but the main one is to find a new and less destructive way of coping with your emotions:
- Listen to music
- Draw vent art
- Write down your feelings
- Talk to someone
- Exercise (if you are into it)
- Have a good cry
- Organise something around you so it is neat
- Squeeze an ice cube for the shock factor to break you out of your mood
- Draw something beautiful like a butterfly or a flower on your skin, to remind you that there are good things in life
- Find a way to avoid your stress triggers
- Snap an elastic band against your skin
In the end it is about finding something new that works for you, and helps you in the same way self harming did. For me it was drawing; listening to music and snapping an elastic band against my skin, depending on my levels of stress. And I can happily say I have not self harmed for nearly 6 months now.
So if you find yourself in this situation, try to find someone to help you or use one of the suggestions above to break out of that way of thinking. It might not work right away but after a few tries it should start easing things for you. So give it a go, and remember you are not alone and there is always help available.
-Artemisofthewild
AnxietyAlliance 